Week-long Fasting

At church the other week, the congregation was challenged to fast from something for one week. We discussed this over dinner with the kids and they were excited and up for the task. My choice was easy to make - sweets and snacks. I absolutely LOVE something sweet and even snacks throughout the day. Jason said he would fast from salt which is a big deal for him. Cameron was quick to say he would give up TV for a week. While Courtnie was a bit reluctant to let go of her TV watching, she agreed in the end to not watch TV for the week. Colton wasn't given a choice and joined his brother and sister in their fasting choice.

We're proud to announce the week has passed and we all survived. The kids are convinced that missing one week of TV means that every show they have ever watched is now just re-runs and old news. Jason and I both lived through a long week without the things we love; we might be skin and bones now but we survived none the less.

This led us to a few conclusions - although I feel the need to have a snack every evening and some sort of chocolate after every meal (kinda like an after dinner mint), I don't necessarily NEED them. And Jason too. He really really wants that salt but he made it through without it. Maybe now he can just have a dash of salt with his food instead of a bit of food with his mound of salt.

The kids - having that TV off was awesome!! Jason and I loved it so much. The kids fought less even though before they fought about other things than the TV. I guess even just the white noise of the TV was a bit hectic. Jason and I are going to discuss some sort of upcoming TV schedule for the kids which will be far less TV. Our kids already watch very little TV but I totally enjoyed them watching nothing. Maybe we will look into it being a privilege?!

In honor of Mother's Day today - I'm having a snack tonight =)

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

I love to read this book! It's a fun read and it so enjoyable for the kids especially when you have them taste everything the caterpillar tasted as you read along the story. And there are so many other fun activities to do that center around the theme of the book.But we have our very own "The Very Hungry Catrpillar" and I don't like him much, or his 3 other family members. We grilled out dinner last night - steak and chicken with baked potatoes, beans and salad. I go to my garden, which is growing VERY nicely, to clip some lettuce for tonights dinner. Do you know what I found? Half of the lettuce had four caterpillars just making a home and eatting our lettuce. That's not all... they poop too!! I just sat there and stared at the lettuce and pondered what to do with the little beasts and their tiny black balls of poo. I decided to go ahead and cut the lettuce they hadn't found and then completely pull the lettuce they had loved on and start over.

Then, I captured the little guys. I now have caterpillars in my house, feeding them (with my very own lettuce which they clearly enjoy), and waiting for them to turn into their chrysalis' and possibly into butterflys. Better to forgive right? So rather than stomp on them and curse them for eatting my meal, I took them in and gave them a good home.

We got them all cozy and situated in a plastic container and I put a stick in there and some lettuce to munch on. We woke up this morning and those boogers ate all the lettuce over night. The jar is now full of more poop. Seriously? I have never seen any of God's creatures eat and poop as much as caterpillar. Amazing. I'm very tempted to put some other kinds of foods in their jar (apples, pears, plums, strawberries, oranges, chocolate cake, ice cream, pickles, swiss cheese, salami, lollipops, cherry pie, sausage, cupcake and watermelon) that the caterpillar in the book ate, just out of curiousity. I'll keep you posted if we decide to go this route.

In the mean time, I am going to make a homemade insect repellent to spray on my fruits and veggies so these little critters will stay away from all my hard work. They're kinda like extra children - something else to keep my eye on, to feed, they eat MY portions, get things dirty, and take over my kitchen space.

I have NO hard feelings, can you tell?

When will it be Monday again?

I'm in the shower enjoying the quiet and alone time when I hear a loud crash coming from somewhere other than where I'm standing. Colton comes running into the bathroom crying saying "I knocked it down! I knocked it down!" So I jump out of the shower, wet and soapy, into the bedroom and frantically look around for whatever has fallen. Colton keeps walking. and walking. and walking. There I find myself bare and exposed in the living room with the front door wide open looking at the disasterous mess one child has made. As I go to turn on the light to further examine my youngest son's demolition capabilities, three light bulbs go out, leaving me with just one bulb to brighten my day. I mean living room.

This accident occured from a one-man football team with a 4 year old Captain. He has the absolute worst throw of anyone I've ever seen. When he throws somehow the ball goes backwards. Strangest thing ever. I never doubt my children's abilities though (especially when it comes to destroying my things). You know what his father said to him? "Was it a good throw son?" For real? I'm glad he wasn't mad at him, but how about a firm talking to? A stern face? Or showing him WHY we don't throw balls in the house? I'll keep my fingers crossed. Maybe I missed a piece of glass and when he steps on a piece it will remind him to have a little talk with his precious youngest son.

So really.... who needs all those decorations anyway? Or lights? Do you see the broken glass and mirror pieces? If there is any truth to the superstition, Colton has a few years of bad luck to endure. Wait. That would be a few years of bad luck for me! Why oh why son?? The good news is - my two picture frames that fell survived with only a few scratches and dents, Hemingway pulled through as well and the candle wasn't lit at that time. Oh yes, and Colton also made it out unharmed.

But wait! Let me back track to our fine morning.....

It was just as eventful. As I'm getting ready for my day I hear the older two yelling at eachother. Generally, they get along well but this morning they were complete enemies with no room for making up and liking eachother. I go in there to assess the problem and Courtnie is trying to talk to me - her face is red, her body is shaking and she's throwing her trash on the ground. This girl is pissed. Apparantly Cameron was trying to help her with Colton's breakfast and grabbed the plate from Courtnie. I settle Round 1 with Courtnie glaring at her beloved brother and Cameron huffing at me with his chest all puffed up. I get back to getting myself ready and here comes Colton to tell me the latest disagreement. Once again, I go back into the kitchen to both kids fuming. This time Courtnie wouldn't get Cameron's vitamins while she got hers because he wouldn't help with Colton's milk. Ah! We ended Round 2 with a nice discussion about being kind and doing things for other people because it's just the nice thing to do. I'm totally convinced it went in one ear and out the other; their lack of eye contact and glares at eachother was a total giveaway. We left for the day and I never had breakfast because their bickering too all my extra time.

So here's to a fun weekend with more rain. I guess we can play football in the house now! There isn't too much left in the living room to destroy at this point.

When is it Monday again? I like Mondays.

ETA - It just dawned on me! I should stay out of my own bathroom!! Apparently, when I head that direction chaos breaks through. That's it. But too bad it won't happen. I'll have to think of a way to stop this madness.

Slug Bug!

We Gautreaux's are VERY competitive in everything we do. You can imagine our excitement when Colton finally figured out what a slug bug was instead of calling out every random car and color and claiming he won, irritating his brother and sister to no end. He has finally perfected his game! This has made car rides a bit different. Depending on the moods of the kids, they set a number and work together to find that many slug bugs OR they want to be on their own teams which sometimes leaves someone mad that they didn't win. (I will confess - I do not like to play with Jason because he ALWAYS wins, it's so very irritating.) Either way, we're just glad Colton has figured out what a slug bug was. He is even counting them correctly which has proved to be a learning lesson for him. It's been neat to see him figure out numbers and how to count things correctly. Even though he has been counting for awhile now, it's fun to watch it all come together and to see him realize that counting actually means something outside of circle time at school. Colton must find, count and call out his slug bugs from his toy box. These were part of his learning lesson in what cars were and were not slug bugs. Cameron and Courtnie made a big effort to teach him this so that he could play right!

My Dear Mother....

When I become a mother so many things happened to me. I realized I wasn't that smart after all and that my own mother knew everything there was to possibly know about life. I began to rely on others (especially my Mom) rather than just myself. It wasn't until I became a mother to my daughter that I began to have more appreciation for her, more respect, and even more guilt.

My daughter truly believes anything that I have (in my purse, in my room, my drawers, closet, wallet, car, cabinets, in my hands, etc) also belongs to her. After a certain period of time (like say 5 minutes), they instantly become hers. Most times this is unknown to me until I go looking for something that I was so sure I had left "right there". These things have ranged from chapstick, lip gloss, bath gels/soaps, bath loofah/scrubber, clothing, shoes, makeup, pens and pencils, my favorite candy or snack, brushes, flat irons, deodorant, purses...... anything she feels she may need in the next few years. Funny thing is, I truly do not believe she takes them intentionally rather she just wants them.

I say this because I did this to my own mom. I never intentionally took things from her to make her go without or with malice in mind. I simply wanted them. I am so sorry Mom!! It's sortof a luxury to have something belong to only me. It's rare for me to actually own something that no one else wants. I've even had my socks taken from my drawer by my son who claimed they were more comfortable than his. There are even times when someone wants more of something to eat and next thing I know their fork is on my plate.

Now that I recognize all a mother desires and lacks.....

I'm sorry Mom!! I'm sorry I came into your bathroom while you were getting ready and took over the countertops and desired space to get ready on your own. I'm sorry for all the times I stood in the mirror in front of you while you were trying to get dressed. For all those times I nabbed something from your purse that belonged to you. For chewing on your straws and making them flat (for the record, this now bothers me too). For all those times I took the last piece of gum or drank the last soda. And for using all the hot water and leaving everyone else to take cold showers. For turning my music up loud or singing at the dinner table or in my bed at night. I'm sorry for complaining about meals you made after you worked all day and took time to cook dinner for us. For you have spent extra time cleaning the house and watching as I left things everywhere.

I fully understand the desire for quiet moments and for your things to not be touched or messed with by little hands. But I also know the joy it brings you to have your kids by your side, to play with your makeup and clothes, to smile when you make their favorite meal, to laugh with you something goes unexpected. And even though someone else is in your space there is that peace that fills your heart while you have a sincere and meaningful moment with your child.

Thank you for all you did for us. I love you more as each new day dawns and I appreciate you and all that you endured as our mother. Thank you for listening to my joys and frustrations, for giving advice and critiques, and more importantly for just being you and being there. I love you Mom!!

More Baseball Pics

We had our second tournament this weekend, even after days and days of heavy rain. Our Saturday schedule was pushed back later into the day and thus pushing back Sundays schedule late into the night. We got home about 10:30 Sunday night and we all ended up staying home today due to lack of sleep and just feeling completely exhausted. But it was a wonderful weekend! They boys won their first game and tied the second, this put them in the third seed for the tournament bracket. They won their next game and played in the championship game which started at 8:30pm. The boys must have given all they had in the previous games because they didnt do so well in that last game. However, this tournament did qualify them for the World Series in July and everyone is excited for that. Also, THANK YOU to Cameron's HUGE fan club this weekend. I was able to catch-up with my dearest friend Abby and her family (sweet Leah wouldnt wake up for me to hold her) and tons of our family was there as well. Cameron loved it! Here are some pics from this weekend. Notice Cameron falling back trying to avoid getting pegged from the ball. Also, please ignore Courtnie & Colton's messy faces. We were out there a really long time yesterday, almost 14 hours. They were filthy! I almost made them find a ride home with someone else! J/K

Deep Thoughts

I've had quite a few realizations recently. I'm thinking this new medicine has slowed my thoughts down enough to actually focus on one at a time. It seems lately I am pondering the same thing until I have reached a conclusion or some sort of answer that is appeasing. My thoughts don't seem to be as jumbled or bouncy as they were at one time. Anyway....

I have been around quite a few babies lately and they are all so sweet. Most are completely happy and content to just be held by anyone with loving arms. This thought led me back to my babies who liked only me (and few other people). I've always wondered why that is, why my children were so attached and fearful of strangers or people who weren't in their daily lives. Then I realized - it was me! I made them that way! I had a serious attachment to my children when they were smaller. I absolutely could not part from them and panicked with nausea when others held them or walked too far away from me. I wanted to be the one to feed them, change them, love on them and to give them every new experience. Because of my anxieties, I passed them on to my children. I also held them all day long. When someone says you can spoil a baby by holding them too much - it's so true! But I don't regret any bit of it and would do the same thing again. There is nothing wrong with holding my babies all day and you definitely can't love them too much.

This all led me to another thought.... I was BORN to be a Mommy. There is not another career or role in life I would want to be other than wife and mommy. Nothing can compare to the experiences I share with my family and children. I absolutely LOVE being a mother. I look forward to each new day and what they entail. Will Cameron run tirelessly around my house again today? Will he have fun playing ball? What outfit will Courtnie surprise us with today? Does dancing bring her joy? Could her smile get any bigger as she watches herself twirl around? What crazy story or comment will Colton have today? What goals will he have for his life?

I love this. I love watching them grow and learn every single day. This past Easter Cameron fully understood the sacrifice Christ made on that cross. The awe in his face was priceless. To watch them grow in their faith and understanding of the Bible and it's truths is incredible. To see them make a new friend is awesome, to set out for a goal and accomplish just that. I cannot ask for anything more.

Another thought-

My dearest Courtnie.... she is so hard to get to know, to understand. She is quiet, modest in most things, few reactions and at the very same time unpredictable and self-assured. I want for her and I to have this close-knit bond, a best-friend type relationship. I've been praying and praying about this. How can I possibly get down to her core, her hearts deepest thoughts and feelings. As we were reading the Easter story this past Sunday, I remembered a Bible we bought her as an infant for Mothers and Daughters. We have started reading this together and I am LOVING it! It has us talking about girly issues - honesty, obeying, self-confidence, etc. She is telling me things so easily when before it was like pulling teeth to get her to open up about anything. This Bible also has me telling her things about myself and what life lessons I have learned and she listens with these open ears and wide eyes so interested in my life. She has been asking me questions about what we've read, about her and me. It's so awesome! It's such an answered prayer. I really needed to have a closer bond with her. Life is so hard when you're older and I want her to come to me. I truly think we are doing a wonderful thing, one that will benefit both of us.

My next thought about my sweet daughter... Of all the things she does that drive me crazy, they are completely ME! Poor thing! That blank look she gets, the lack of emotion sometimes and the dramatics of too much emotion, her demanding way about certain things, her shyness and timidness towards others, her lack of affection and desire to be untouched. It's all me. That little girl may look like her Daddy but she is more like me than I have ever realized. But I do love her so!!

Beating the Odds

I don't really like to complain or vent on my blog. But sometimes I just want to write things off my chest. And since this is MY blog, well then I can write anything I want. Because it's my blog.

It looks like I've beat the odds. Woo-hoo.

Remember the procedure I had done awhile back (October 2008 if you want to re-read my posts about this) that would lighten or even stop my periods altogether? This procedure works for 97% of patients. Well how wonderful, that percentage doesn't include me. 9 weeks after the procedure my bleeding finally stopped. This is not normal healing time and I should have known then, but I was trying out my optimistic skills. Since then I have had a period every month but it hasn't been too bad. Heck, anything shorter than 2-3 weeks was much appreciated! But it seems now they are heading back down the torture road as I am currently having a very normal and long period. I cannot even begin to describe my level of frustration right now. I'm tired of this - the bleeding for week after week, the breakouts on my face because my body is freaking out, the inconvenience in my marriage from having a period this long among many other fun details I'm certain all women can sympathize with.

Clearly, God has other plans for me at this time in my life and being period-free is obviously not one of them. I'm not sure what those plans include but I'm open to suggestions (this is my written prayer). As I close my eyes and talk to God about His plans for me, I can't help but wonder what He has in store. A lesson to learn that I'm not picking up on just yet? A hysterectomy maybe? I'd like to keep all pieces of me, but now the idea isn't sounding as terrible as it once had. I just have to understand that there is a reason for everything and some questions I'll never have an answer for. But I'm putting my faith in knowing that through every season in life, good will come from those times.

Happy Easter!

Our Easter celebrations began Wednesday at Colton's school. They had an egg hunt there and a special lunch. He was super excited to take his eggs and candy to school. I am blessed to be in a position where I could easily go outside with his class and watch him hunt eggs and take pictures. Here he is at school, I love his face in the first one.We spent Good Friday at home. I LOVE family time! I really do. There is nothing more enjoyable than relaxing at home with no plans to run around and do this and that and simply enjoying the time together. I think I could sit outside in warm weather with the sun beating on my face watching my kids play outside for the rest of my life and be perfectly content. Really.

Saturday morning, my Dad's side of the family came over for brunch. The kids colored their Easter eggs while some of us adults hid eggs around the house. We put a fun spin on the eggs this year - we numbered the money eggs and each child had to find their own numbered egg. This definitely slowed the older boys down.

We went to Easter services on Saturday afternoon and then Jason and I slipped away for dinner together. Nothing big or fancy, just a couple of hours alone. Thank you Jason for always pushing for a dinner for two, for caring so much about us and for loving me even when I'm not so lovable sometimes. I love you Babe =)

Easter morning, the kids woke up to surprises left by the Easter Bunny. Cameron of course had figured the "bunny" thing out awhile ago but Courtnie figured it out this year. I'm sad. It's a step away towards childlike innocence. As much as I want them to keep that forever I know overtime they grow up, but really do they have to do this so quickly?

Sunday for lunch, Jason's mom came over and we grilled out lunch. She brought Easter baskets for the kids and then hid eggs inside for them to find. We spent quite a bit of time outside that morning after the rain playing with their new outside toys.

Afterwards we went to my Moms house for our last celebration. Every year they have roughly 2000 eggs (at least!) but this year with the rain they tried something different. After all, there aren't near as many kids to hunt these days as there were when we were kids. We all (kids and adults) played Easter Bingo. For each bingo there were baskets full of prizes we could pick from and then there was basket full of stuffed eggs that Mom threw at us at random times during the game. If you weren't careful and watching it might have hit you! However, if it was a money egg no one cared how it landed in their laps! I had the greatest fun and would like to do this again next year. Here are the GREAT grandkids on this side of the family.

Cameron's First Job

I took Cameron this afternoon for his first ever paying job - mowing a yard! I am proud of him so much. He such a great kid and is going to be a incredible gentleman one day. He understands and appreciates the value of a dollar and was excited to make his own money. He really never even seemed shy about it, which was awesome. It took him almost an hour and half and he did wonderful. This was the first time this yard has been mowed this season so he obviously hit a few glitches as all yards do on their first mow. After tonight though, it should be fairly easy for him.